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This personal essay is written by adult content creator Alex A. We've agreed not to use her legal name to protect her identity. I sat in a small examination room at St. Paul's Hospital in Vancouver and tears filled my eyes. The doctor held my hand and said, "It's going to be ok," but I couldn't help but have doubts. After more than two decades of failed treatments for my chronic bowel disease, I was desperate for relief.

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I began live-streaming adult webcam shows. It wasn't just the financial stability that appealed to me, but also the freedom to express myself. Why shouldn't we be represented in the pornography that we are consuming? Alex A. So I turned to sex work out of desperation. Butter Sugoi. Create a Free Account and then. Cross My Heart and Hope to Die. After all, bowel function isn't exactly small talk. In a strange way it was exactly what I needed in order to reframe my relationship with my body. Soon I was writing, producing, and starring in my own adult films.

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Sharing the most vulnerable parts of myself was ultimately just the beginning of my journey to self acceptance. I could also make my own schedule, meaning I could take as many sick days as necessary. They found it fascinating. Many admirers sent donations on days when I didn't have the strength to perform. My Little Sister is the Demon Lord! I didn't know anyone with an ostomy that I could ask for guidance, let alone someone my age. More from this episode First Person. This personal essay is written by adult content creator Alex A. After more than two decades of failed treatments for my chronic bowel disease, I was desperate for relief. After all, bowel function isn't exactly small talk. Paul's Hospital in Vancouver and tears filled my eyes.